devoting yourself to my is the biggest shame that everyone receives however it does not mean you don’t have the capability to dominate your emotions.it’s the fantasy that everyone sees despite only a few are able to achieve emotional detachment

here are some effective techniques that will help you to achieve emotional detachment

1. Mindfulness awareness

2. Mindfulness breathing

3. Mindfulness labeling

4. Mindfulness acceptance

5. Mindfulness companion

We will go step by step in a few minutes but for your comprehending want you to understand some basic ground rules

Mindfulness emotional regulation skill

well you already know that emotional regulation is a skill to make yourself from emotional baggage suffering by dominating your mind or thought rather than adverse

Three phases of self-regulation

Self-regulation learning depends on three phases: forethought, performance, self-reflection. These sequential phases lead to one another means all these faces are essential for learning.

 New learners address this like that don’t need self-regulation learning for understanding the concept however, it is not a generic concept, actually, if you are new in this then you don’t need to fully understand this but a simple overview of its three faces are quite enough.

1. Forethought:

This is the preparation state for self-regulated learning. it reveals the difference between self-regulated learners or non-self-regulated learners because most of the non-self-regulated learners start without completing this phase.

They Analyse their task and begin without any understanding but in the forethought phase, the first thing that is needed  ”goal-setting” means what you actually want to achieve.

The next thing that we need is ”strategic planning”  if you have a good understanding of your goal, but you don’t have a specific plan to achieve that then you might fail.

The third thing that we need is ”self-motivation believe” this is the most essential things to pursue your goal

2. Performance

This is the main step in pursuing your goal. You can say that it’s a “learning phase” but remember it is one of three phases.

In this face learner manages their learning through “self-control” I know self-control is thought as a broad ability for learning but it’s quite easier than you might be thinking you just need to develop strategic planning which you have already done in the previous phase.

the self-control process is related to self-monitoring when you learn something you observe yourself the reason behind this step when you observe yourself you understand what is working or what’s not

3. Self-reflection

This is the last phase of self-regulated learning. It is also important as well as first or second. It contains two important aspects “self-judgment” or “self reaction”

Self-judgment learners try to understand what’s the thing that causes success or failure so they are able to diagnose their mistakes and the learning goal.

Why is self-regulation important

self-regulation is not crucial as it looks our society has present this as crucial,

Self-regulation is important for our different aspects of life.

1. Satisfaction is the most important aspect of life to live happily and self-regulation provides this ability to feel self-satisfaction from inside.

2. Developing social skills is also important; suppose a child becomes an adult with low social skills, what would you think he will be able to manage to help emotions in social situations, know my opinion in comments.

3. Managing stress is crucial for those who don’t have self-regulation skills. Now days mostly, teens and youth are facing more stress-related problem

4. Achieving goals self-regulation learning brings in your motivation to pursue your goal and achieve them.

5. A sense of control has a direct impact on our life. Have you ever gotten frustrated by your mind which is continuously throwing all the painful experiences which are held in the past? Here the amazing fact about self-regulation you can learn to make yourself calm better than ever.

How the brain controls emotions and affects self-regulation

well, you already know that our mind plays a major role in our emotional response I know it sounds obvious

Our brain consists of by togethering the different parts and all works together to process the information, but the main part of the brain that responsible for emotional response is “limbic system”  or “emotional brain”

the part of the limbic system known as the “amygdala” that access emotional stimuli. it is the main part of our brain responsible for emotional  response or fight or flight  mode reaction

Effects of the brain on self-regulation 

1. increased heart rate:

when our brain controls our emotion it also controls the emotion that causes by that emotion 

for example: when we are in Danger sanitation, we lose our sense of control  now our brain responses  according to our past experiences or thoughts  

and it’s response can be seen as increased heart rate, well it’s not the only reason that causes increased heart rate but this how our brain response

2. breathing rate:

breathing rate is also one of the examples of how our brain affects our emotional response

for example: have you ever notice how your breath decrease  when  you are  tense  or emotionally disturbed so in this  case, your brain handle your response according to sanitation

3. flight or fight response:

flight and fight response is also an example of how your brain affects your emotional response.  

suddenly when you get excited your mind goes in fight mode and when yo;u are in normal you came back in flight mode or {autopilot mode}

How poor emotional regulation  harm us

our emotional response says much about us but  most of  us often neglect  this reaction  and hence  it causes the problems 

1. depression:

Nowadays depression  is becoming more and more common for teens and youths and also for elders 

Everyone faces depression in their life from time to time. but the poor emotional regulation is one  of the major reason that causes depression 

for example:  when a child is growing  he tries to learn everything that will help him in the future but if he didn’t learn the proper  emotion regulation skill 

that can cause him to gain depression easily

2. anxiety or stress:

I know many of us to get confused when it comes to anxiety or depression people think they both are same

Is depression or anxiety the same?

No, depressions or anxiety are not same, however, depression is the next state of  anxiety

means whenever we  get intense situation  our  mental  balance gets disturbed  and causes  anxiety  or stress but if we stay in this state for more time then it causes depression

3. post-traumatic stress disorder{PTSD}

post-traumatic stress disorder  held  due to  traumatic events such as  Disaster, Death of loved one, Rape or terrorist attack

a person who suffers {PTSD}  show the symptoms after 1 or 2 months and it last up to a year 

How to learn the emotional regulation skill through mindfulness

mindfulness provides the ability to confess with painful experience or thoughts and 

help to conquer the  fear of pain, ache, sufferings

1. mindfulness-awareness:

awareness is the first step to regulate emotion. awareness means to be aware of your thoughts, or sensation which is coming to your mind

becoming exposed to every or open for every thought, sensation  or feelings  is the easiest way to become aware in life,

how do I become aware of my thoughts?

 whenever  any thought  came to your mind  just say “thinking” it does not have to be loud just in your mind 

if you notice  any emotion coming  to you  be open for to bare that  and expect that by saying  “feeling”

similarly, if you caught  any sensation  on your body  say “body sensation”

you can  practice  this exercise wherever you want  but the morning is the best for this 

2. mindfulness breathing

breathing is the most effective way to make yourself aware. whenever you take a longer breath your body get full oxygen and result in awareness

so whenever you notice  yourself  taking shorter breath pause for a moment and start belly breathing

3. mindfulness labeling

it’s time for another exercise  but this time  when you notice thought is popping up in your mind

I want you to label your thought 

when you notice yourself thinking about something give them a specific name like judging, criticizing, body pain, etc.

4.  mindfulness acceptance

the main of doing mindfulness is to notice all the experiences that are come to your mind without any judgment 

remember there is no layering over the experience with a further personal or biased perspective.

This biased perspective further leads to a desire or rejection of what you are currently experiencing. Your normal response to any experience is to be the initial judgment. rather than  accepting  the reaction

Let’s say  Neil is in dite because he wants to lose weight when he saw the ice-cream, his sense of carving became strong for eating ice-cream and he ate that. Now he is criticizing herself that he always do this mistake and that’s why he is overweight and therefore no one loves her 

now in the above example, you can see how one judgment leads to another  but in actuality, there is no need for further judgment

Neil has to understand  that   eating ice-cream does not have any connection that makes her unloveable

 

let’s see this scenario with a different perspective

when Neil  eat the ice-cream he can say to her self  by accepting I eat this ice-cream  because of mind  or sense of carving which always  force me to do same, now I understand how it will force me to do, so in future, if this type of situation came again I‘ll be aware

5. mindfulness compassion

 mindfulness compassion is really  important if you want to become aware  or regulate your emotion  properly 

how often  we denied   our inner voice  “the voice of the inner child” everyone has an inner child in them which act in a child-like manner, we always denied the voice of that child which leads a sense of emptiness or frustration 

but when we listen to her or make them feel love or compassion it will ultimately give us a sense of satisfaction in life.